It happens very rarely, that time when no one else is home and I get the pad all to myself! It’s not that I do anything particularly extravagant with that time. It’s simply a blessing to have the quiet, the stillness, to not have to find socks or lunchboxes, keys or any other items of miscellany. I do get a lot of time to myself, but it’s primarily spent doing work around our home, organizing, cleaning and yardwork. But it’s the time for myself, that complete, uninterrupted stillness which I covet. Sitting on our deck and gazing off into the sky, watching the hummingbirds and bees be nourished from the flowers, hearing the local covey of quail guiding each other over the land and of course, as Pablo our cat would agree, there is nothing more important than petting him!
Don’t get me wrong. I wouldn’t trade my family for the world, but there are daydreams of having a small off-site writing retreat by the ocean…and that’s when the time-outs begin to beckon! Regardless of whether my beau and daughter are home, it’s imperative for me to find these time-outs.! These pockets of time, these spaces of our own are integral to our wellbeing because it is within these realms that we stop externalizing and begin to get still. And when we get still, we get restored. When we get restored, we feel energized, inspired, “in spirit”.
I hear from so many women who feel spent, exhausted, uninspired, lethargic. We spend five days a week giving to our employer and then spend the remainder of the week giving to our families, friends, partners that we forget to invest in ourselves. By the time we realize how depleted we are, we begin to grasp at things we think will fix us, when really all we need is the simple maintenance plan of ‘alone-time’.
Give Yourself a Time-Out:
Inform everyone in your home that you are entering into a ‘no buzz zone' for 45 minutes (or more if you can get away with it.) During that time no “honey can you?”, no “Mommy where is?”, no CNN 24-hour News Coverage, no Spongebob, no talking, grumbling Furbees, no interruptions, no interactions, no phone calls, emails..in fact surgically remove your smartphone from your body and throw it at least 100 feet away from you!
During this time practice going within for at least 10 minutes. “Within where??” That means being quiet. It means being in the quiet without focusing on something else. It means being okay with being quiet. Notice your surroundings without needing to prune that plant or sweep the floor or wash that dish. Just BE.
And those of you who live without the family pandemonium? Don’t think you’re excluded here. You’re getting time to yourself all the time, but are you appreciating it and utilizing it? When I lived alone…(insert sparkly, flashback, harp music) I loved coming home at the end of the day, lighting candles, playing music, cooking, reading or simply sitting out on my tiny patio. So many of us aren’t accustomed to being quiet and alone. And remember….alone time does not have to equate loneliness.
Let this time nourish the most important relationship you’ll ever have, the one with your spirit. And the only way to truly cultivate it is within a time-out.
How do you create a Time-Out for yourself? Tell me about it in the comments below!
Also 'Like' or 'Tweet' to remind your friends and the women in your family to take
their own Time-Out!